How to Gracefully Deal with Transitions

Transition brings up so many uncomfortable emotions. When I took my first leap out of a corporate career and started my own company, I faced so much fear and anxiety. When the future is unknown, questions abound. How will I make a living? Will anyone hire me? How do I do this? Uncertainty can whip you into a frenzy of what ifs. What if I can’t make pay my bills? What if I'm not capable of running a business? What if if I fail?

Deep Breath. 

Here are some things to keep in mind about transitions.

Acknowledge that change is difficult.

When you do something unfamiliar– like take a bigger job, lead a larger team, or jump into a new career, it can bring up many difficult emotions. Transitions are hard because the journey looks dangerous. Acknowledge that the journey may be hard and remind yourself that you have the internal resources to handle this transition.

Feel your feelings.

When facing a seemingly precarious journey, sit with your feelings. Some days you may feel energized and excited. Lean into those feelings. Other days, you may feel anxious. Acknowledge and name those hard feelings. Name Them to Tame Them. Rather than bottle up or suppress those emotions, feel them in your body. Then, express your feelings in a culturally appropriate way. If you are fearful, shake your body to release the fear. If you are angry, go for a run or punch a pillow. If you are sad, go ahead - cry.

Shift your Identity.

Many of us spend a lot of time and energy creating and investing in our roles. Executive. Entrepreneur. Parent. Artist. Writer. Our identities are constantly changing. If you are a parent, you know what I mean. There are different ways to parent at every stage of your child’s life: infant, baby, toddler, child, teen, and adult. Your role as parent changes. This is the same for any work shift. Maybe your role on a project has changed, the work conditions have changed, or your job has changed. With any change, your identity must shift along with these changes.

Express Gratitude for the Past.

When are making a transition, we usually leave something behind. What we are leaving behind is often what keeps us from making the changes that we yearn to make. When I coach clients making a shift into something new, I have them think about what they are leaving behind. I ask them to consider all the things they are grateful for in the jobs or careers they are leaving. I encourage them to name those things, feel the gratitude in their bodies, and sit with that gratitude. Consider doing this gratitude exercise for yourself as you make any transition.

Deal with Resistance.

If you find yourself stuck in the same place or moving slowly towards your goals, it's likely that you are facing resistance. Sometimes it’s not enough to proclaim your commitments and have others keep you accountable. May times, the issue is deeper. Likely, you are dealing with a polarity - where one part of you conflicts with another part of you. When you identify these parts within you that are in conflict, you can move through your resistance to change.

Here’s one example. In 2004, I was considering a big career transition. I wanted to leave my brand management job at a large consumer packaged goods company and become a brand planner at an advertising agency. There was a part of me that wanted to be in a creative environment like an agency, but another part of me that wanted the status of working directly in a business. I had to sit with both parts – the part that wanted creativity and the other that wanted status. By acknowledging these different parts in me, I moved past my resistance and eventually made the career move that I yearned to make. 

Vision for the future.

When you are making any transition, visualize what the future may hold. Do this vision exercise. Conjure up an image of a situation in which you felt proud, confident and accomplished. Sit with the emotions of that event. Imagine the new job or situation you want to manifest. Visualize manifesting this dream, taking note of where you are, what you are doing and who you are with. Feel those same feelings of pride and confidence you’ve felt in the past. Spend some time reveling in this space and make a note of what unfolds there. After this short visualization, journal about what you saw and experienced. From this place, write a vision for your future. Having a clear picture of what you want in the future helps make your dreams feel attainable.

We face transitions all the time – whether it's a small t transition or a big T Transition. Every three months, we go through a seasonal change. We transition through new moons and new years. When professional stagnation sets in, many of us look for more challenging roles that encourage progress and advancement. Career dissatisfaction often leads us to seek new opportunities. Because growth characterizes human development, continuous career transitions are inevitable.

As you face a transition, remember these five facets: acknowledge that change is difficult, shift your identity, express gratitude for your past, deal with resistance, and create a vision for the future. And don’t forget to celebrate your transitions along the way.